Ivanov by Anton Chekhov

Author:Anton Chekhov
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

Act Three

Ivanov’s study. A desk on which papers, books, official packages and knick-knacks and revolvers lie in disorder; among the papers is a lamp, a carafe of vodka, a plate with salted herrings, pieces of bread and pickled cucumbers. On the walls, maps, pictures, guns, pistols, sickles, whips and so on. Midday.

Shabelsky and Lebedev sit on either side of the desk. Borkin is in the middle of the stage, astride a chair. They sprawl, somewhat in their cups, like lords of the earth, ruling on the great issues of the world. Pyotr stands by the door.

LebedevNow France . . . France has a clear-cut and definite policy . . . Your Frenchy knows what he wants. He wants to kick the tripes out of your German sausage-maker, simple as that. But Germany’s whistling a different tune, my friend. Germany has plenty of other geese to cook besides France.

ShabelskyYou’re talking rubbish. If you ask me, the Germans are cowards, and so are the French. They’re pulling faces behind each other’s backs, but take my word for it, that’s as far as it will go. They won’t fight.

BorkinBut what I’m saying is, there’s no need to fight. All these rearmament congresses and vast expenditure . . . it’s completely unnecessary. You know what I’d do? Round up every dog in the country, give ‘em a good dose of rabies and let them loose across the border. The enemy will be frothing at the mouth in a month.

Lebedev(laughs) There’s a billion brilliant ideas swimming about in that little head, one for every fish in the ocean.

ShabelskyHe’s a genius.

LebedevGod bless you, Michel Michelich! You’re a hoot. (Soberly.) However, gentlemen, here we are jawing away and hardly a mention of vodka. Repetatur!

He fills three glasses.

Here’s to us.

They drink and eat.

Salted herring, Lord love it – greatest snack there is.

ShabelskyNo – cucumber. The best minds have been thinking about this since the world began and they haven’t come up with anything to beat a pickled cucumber. (To Pyotr.) We need more cucumbers, Pyotr, and tell the kitchen to do four onion pasties. Make sure they’re hot.

Pyotr goes out.

LebedevAnother snack vodka’s good with is caviar. I’ll tell you what, though, it requires intelligence. You take four ounces of caviar, two spring onions, some olive oil, mix it well and serve with a squeeze of lemon. The aroma by itself is enough to make you swoon.

BorkinTo follow a shot of vodka, fried gudgeon makes a nice little snack, I find. Only, you have to know how to fry it. You clean it, dip it in breadcrumbs, and fry till crisp – it’s got to be crunchy to the bite, crunch, crunch.

ShabelskyThat was a good snack at Babakina’s yesterday – white mushrooms.

LebedevOh, yes, indeed –

ShabelskyBut to a special recipe, you know, with onion, bay leaf, different kinds of herbs . . . The steam when they took the lid off the pan had a fragrance that was pure joy.

LebedevWho’s for another? Repetatur, gentlemen!

They drink.

Good health. (Looks at his pocket watch.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.